A Grassroots Marketing Campaign for Ashley Bay

Ashley Bay is not Pearl Harbor director Michael Bay's wife, it's the title of a work of Christian fiction by a man named Rob R. Thompson. Rob R. Thompson is a former member of the New Hampshire House of Representatives, a lobbyist for the Christian Coalition, and Political Director for Alan Keyes's 2000 presidential campaign.

Last month my store received a telephone order for three hardcover copies of Ashley Bay from someone calling himself Rob Rowe. When the books arrived at the store it was discovered that the number Rob Rowe had given was out of service, and upon further investigation, it was revealed that Rob R. Thompson's middle name is Rowe. The managers deduced that the order had been placed by Rob R. Thompson himself, a devious plot to trick us into stocking his book. If that is in fact true, Mr. Thompson 's understanding of the publishing industry is much poorer than one might expect.

Still, I feel for the man. It's hard to spend a lot of time on something, only to have it released by a shitty press no one cares about, to never see it on shelves in local stores, and to be remembered primarily as the political director of Alan Keyes's 2000 presidential campaign. His rude little stunt was a cry for attention, and in some small way it has succeeded. Rob R. Thompson, I am going to help you out-- I'm going to use my blog to advertise your book. Free of charge.
Of course, I don't have room for a very long excerpt. Many of you (and here I'm thinking of Katie Youell) have already stopped reading and left to check the Internet Movie Database. So I have selected six extremely brief, random passages from Ashley Bay. You may judge their worth for yourself, and if the spirit moves you the complete book is available online, or at my Barnes and Noble, located at 5501 West Broad Street, conveniently less than a mile from Interstate 64 .

The stories of the sea fascinated me as if I were a young man seeking pirate like adventures all over again. (pg 31)

Smacking my teeth and licking the hitchhikers off my fingers, I made my way to the sidewalk nearest my son to be young friend. [sic] (pg 37)

Dottie adjusted her abundance and in a Yankee like manner informed me, "Don't bull shit me boy. all the Dartmouth know how language can't undo simple disappointments [sic]. When you feel bad get it out, it's like the flu. We won't get better if we want to stay sick, aye?" (pg 50)

I lay down as I had for sometime now, arms at my side and staring at a pockmarked ceiling. It was a ceiling that was once strewn with welcome home balloons, congratulation signs and happy birthday wishes but not anymore. It was now a ceiling that saw gray stains of doubt and cobwebs of forgetfulness and it hovered over me as I welcomed the night. (pg 94)

"We grew up mostly here and Mama died and is buried up the road aways The war came and I went and did some fighting, joined the army met my gal Ruthie brought her here and here we made out lives." [sic] (pg 157)

My bones had become frail, my hair more gray and my vision questionable for night time use. Otis too looked older certainly fatter than when our journey had begun. He was likely to soon sit on his stomach and not the part of his body that God had intended for such purposes. (pg 218)

Ashley Bay (ISBN 1-59682-021-7) is published by Fultus Corporation. Their website is at www.fultus.com.

Mr. Thompson, feel free to express your gratitude using the comment feature.