My parents are really religious. Sometimes this doesn't bother me. They are really open-minded. They don't believe in hell, and they go to a church where they hand out anti-war pins before the service. So sometimes I am alright with it, but other times, when they come home after church and are talking over all the church news, and they start using the word minister as a verb, or talking about how so-and-so was "called" to do something, then I think they are nuts.
I also hate that they want to convert me. Just now my mother was reading from the Bible and told me I really ought to read about Elijah the Tishbite and his encounter with Jezebel.
"Elijah is my favoite prophet."
We then argued about who the best prophet was, my contention being that it was Isaiah the Googoofuck.
On the few occaisons that I do go to church with them- and my mom makes me go up and take communion with her, and then tries to sing harmony to the hymns but just ends up sounding out of tune- sometimes, secretly, and particularly when they pray, I think about the apes and the black monolith at the beginning of 2001. I imagine my parents jumping up and down and hooting around a cross.
Posts
