Three National Figures of No Importance

Amber Frey
Witness: For the Prosecution of Scott Peterson hit bookstores everywhere last week, and is sure to become a bestseller. For anyone unaware, and I have the deepest respect for those of you who are, this is the story of Amber Frey, a young woman who briefly dated Scott Peterson and later served as a Witness: For the Prosecution at his trial. I haven't read the thing, but apparently she was very brave, and very concerned about Laci Peterson and Laci's unborn child, and she feels some kind of bond with her even though they never met. This bond, if I remember correctly, stems from the fact that they are both women. Also, at one point Ms. Frey apparently drew strength from her faith.
I was working the customer service booth at Barnes and Noble on the day Witness was released, and put copies in the hands of at least a dozen middle-aged women before noon. Around noon a young man who looked like he might work construction came in, probably on his lunch break. I can't remember what he asked me for, but when he saw the big stack of Witness, he pulled one down to examine it. The examination lasted roughly thirty seconds, after which he pushed it back across the counter to me.
"Nope," he said. "She's just not classy," and walked away.

Randy Moss
Similarly not classy is Randy Moss, star wide receiver for the Minnesota Vikings. Mr. Moss caused an uproar in the National Football League last week when he walked off the field with three seconds left on the time clock. Angry at his teammates, frustrated by losing, under the mistaken impression that he would not be going to the playoffs, Moss headed for the locker room on national television while his team remanined on the field to make a last ditch effort. He could be seen walking off the field over and over again for the rest of the week, as different football commentators weighed in with their opinions, every one of them damning.
"He's immature and conceited. It was a terrible decision."
"He needs to learn to control his emotions and grow up."
"He acted with no concern for anyone but himself. It was the most selfish thing I'd ever seen."
Selfish, overly emotional, immature, reckless, it is bizarre to me that these qualities, so offensive in a black football player, are so popular in a white chief executive. Each acts without thought, responding unwisely to the situation in which he finds himself-- one walks out on a football game, the other murders innocent citizens of third world nations. And we get upset about the football game, beause after all, there were playoff implications, and you just don't do that to 56 other guys who have worked hard all year. You just don't.

Paris Hilton
I am told that Ms. Hilton thinks she invented the hip new catch phrase, "That's hot."
Clearly she didn't, and I think that's all that need be said.