Sunday, December 21, 2008

"Bookends, Baby! Don't do it!"

Just now I turned on ESPN's NFL Countdown for the second or third time all season and saw Cris Carter and Keyshawn Johnson discussing the Detroit Lions.
As you may or may not know, the Detroit Lions are in the running for the title of "The Worst NFL Team in History." In the fifteenth week of a seventeen week season they have yet to win a game, and their chances for going 0-17 are looking solid. The question posed to Messieurs Carter and Johnson: How would you fix the Lions for next season and turn them into a winning team?
Mr. Johnson fielded the question, saying he would hire a great new general manager and fire everyone currently associated with the team including the security guards. As he elaborated on the rest of his plans, his remarks were punctuated by Mr. Carter's periodic interjections--
"Don't get a pair of bookends like us," he said, alluding to the fact that Messieurs Johnson and Carter are both former star wide receivers. "Don't forget this is Middle America. These are hard-working blue collar fans, and they wanna see hard working men on the field. You need to build the running game and the defense so these fans can have something they can relate to."
For those of you not familiar with football, this might be meaningless and boring, but he was in essence saying that working people would rather watch slow moving games where lots of people get hit, instead of up-tempo games with lots of passing and high scores.
Mr. Carter strikes me as out-of-touch with the thoughts and feelings of Middle America, and I wish that he would refrain from speaking for people with whom he is unfamiliar.

1 comment:

Caitlin Phillips said...

My best bet would be giving Kevin Smith more play time. He is arguably the nicest guy on that team, plus he looks great in blue.