Trouble in Mind

I haven't posted in awhile, in part because I've been under a lot of stress. The VCU Financial Aid office took away my financial aid, and for a week I didn't thinK I was getting it back. That caused me to start having panic attacks. I was pretty sure I knew they were panic attacks, but I was freaked out anyway-- afraid I would die or have to drop out of school or both. I had chest pain, arm pain, thigh pain, ear pain, neck pain, light-headedness, all of which seemed attributable to anxiety, but in my less rational moments I was picturing my funeral and wondering which of my friends and family would end up with my belongings when I fell dead from a heart attack. Worse still were fantasies where I suffered a stroke and was left paralyzed in bed for the rest of my life, possibly writing a book by blinking my left eyelid.
Today, after some health insurance related delays, I finally saw a nurse practitioner, had some blood drawn and an EKG, and found out I was pretty much fine. They gave me a pamphlet about managing the stress of college life.

Feeling better, I headed to work. There on the playground I ran into a six-year-old roaming the mulch in an oversized pink coat. She had a headband pushed halfway back her head, and stray hairs were coming out from under it and going in all directions. Her face was splotched with dirt, and for some reason she kept scratching at her tongue with her fingernails.
"My tastebuds are coming off," she told me. "That's when your taste buds fall off your tongue. I'm pretty sure it's because of my toothbrush."
Not at all upset, she bopped off to the sandbox, and I reflected on how this girl, whom I'd always pegged for crazy, suddenly seemed marginally sane.